My life derailed in the last years. I’m nearly fifty years old now and life got out of balance, massively. I don’t know how that happened and I don’t know why it happened but getting into my forties was a bigger transition than I could ever imagine.

My purpose in life got lost, in business, in family life, in marriage, in friendly relations. I felt empty, I lost faith, I lost positivity and the future seems to be more insecure than ever though it should be the opposite.

So, unsure about what to do, I know there has to be something new. As I was always interested in eastern philosophies in my youth, and stoicism and meditation got such a trend over the last years I tried to learn more about Zen.
After reading several books I really got no idea and also some ideas what it’s about.

At the moment I thought I got a clue what it’s about I lost it again. This is my own experience of how I live through this transition.

I want to share this, so I guess it’s an anachronistic blog.